tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-21133931465496746772011-12-03T06:31:01.241-08:001.2.3.4.hey.hanahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02776457730215361943noreply@blogger.comBlogger3401100tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2113393146549674677.post-42425589809207826482011-11-21T09:44:00.000-08:002011-11-21T10:08:05.643-08:00

Raynay- Yes I have my own pole. It was the best purchase of my life, google search x pole uk, gather $400 and you got it:]I wish I weren't so terribly busy now but...... I've been on a week long binge as the week before it I had literally no food or money. Then I get food money and what happens? ugh.more later.

hey.hanahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02776457730215361943noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2113393146549674677.post-74744475001469335102011-10-12T07:01:00.000-07:002011-10-12T07:22:58.233-07:00

The biggest difference between now and before? I'm here doing my morning routine, dancing in my workout gear as a warm up for my workout (best warm up EVER. I've never been so dedicated to sweating every day.) - you may recall that I used to be a stripper. Well, it's very difficult to find an environment friendly to that sort of physical expression when you a) don't party anymore and b) don't

hey.hanahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02776457730215361943noreply@blogger.com5tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2113393146549674677.post-35789928307430873482011-10-03T18:31:00.003-07:002011-10-03T18:31:54.606-07:00

I miss you :[

hey.hanahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02776457730215361943noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2113393146549674677.post-44176836174908813032011-06-28T09:15:00.000-07:002011-06-28T10:50:41.857-07:00

http://youtu.be/rSZnDF3ltCM **new link**I was FB browsing and one of these girls was suggested to be my friend ((I've never met her that I recall and she doesn't even live in my city but w/e)). I can't help but feel like even thought these girls have relatively nice bodies I feel like I wouldn't be satisfied with those bodies. Dunno they're very pretty and great photos and everything ((I don't

hey.hanahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02776457730215361943noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2113393146549674677.post-8360016070765445692011-06-26T09:50:00.000-07:002011-06-26T09:57:26.803-07:00

Or am I Fat BECAUSE I haven't gotten it..???The Boy inquired into the date of my last period, because it seems it's been a while and I feel like my boobs are fucking HUGE. I assumed they were growing because I've been a little FUCKING piggy for the last few weeks and apparently I gain weight in my boobs and lower stomach area first...No period when I should be getting it this week, pregnancy test

hey.hanahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02776457730215361943noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2113393146549674677.post-29348096247079650452011-06-23T10:37:00.000-07:002011-06-23T10:43:16.180-07:00

I left blogger open on the computer my roommate is letting me use. FUCK. Thus why I tried to keep my old laptop as my personal one... fuck old computers not working anymore!Did she see anything? Who knows. Maybe she's not nosy.In other news, first therapy session yesterday evening... Felt soooo good to get everything out. I totally lied about having any kind of problem with food or my weight. I

hey.hanahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02776457730215361943noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2113393146549674677.post-53337590842199522272011-06-19T15:40:00.000-07:002011-06-19T15:59:52.004-07:00

Wish this computer could come to the couch with me, until then slash until I get better posts are postponedthis shit SUCKS. *sob*::EDIT:: I purged today. Meaning I made it 19 days without purging. Is this good, or sad?I had a scary dream involving two burglars who were going to hurt me. I couldn't call 911, as I realized my phone was nothing more than a toy - and that I must be dreaming. Once

hey.hanahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02776457730215361943noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2113393146549674677.post-53311278824505983962011-06-17T20:53:00.000-07:002011-06-17T21:04:26.508-07:00

first - apologies for my hiatus. My computer has been fucked and I haven't wanted to use my roommates for this specific purpose. But now I'm saying WHATEVER because ... dun dun dun dun! After weeks of semi-binging and apathy ((and then a few days of getting my mind back)), I can honestly and proudly say that I just slid into my motivational size 26 skinny jeans with NO problems - it's even loose

hey.hanahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02776457730215361943noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2113393146549674677.post-38276620742983423502011-06-08T18:25:00.000-07:002011-06-08T20:02:07.954-07:00

For counseling today. Should be starting in a couple weeks. Breathe Me by Sia (cover)That song I wrote...:

hey.hanahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02776457730215361943noreply@blogger.com6tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2113393146549674677.post-289343043552910842011-06-08T13:25:00.000-07:002011-06-08T13:35:24.823-07:00

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jagV981jXnw&feature=youtube_gdata_player what I wish I had said today: "i REALIZE it's nothing to be upset over - that's why there's something WRONG with me."How can you explain that every small thing that goes wrong is times a million because you ate first thing this morning? Or that yes, we're having this deeply serious conversation about all my problems but all I

hey.hanahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02776457730215361943noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2113393146549674677.post-53850495879895068142011-06-04T06:05:00.000-07:002011-06-04T06:26:16.304-07:00

Well, I used school as an excuse to clean my cupboards. The good news: I'm done with my final! Yay, maymester is over! BAD news: I consumed literally all the junk food available to me in a nonstop fashion the whole time I was writing the final paper.I'm going to forgive myself very VERY quickly so that I don't make it any worse. I am determined not to purge AT ALL this month ((I threw away my

hey.hanahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02776457730215361943noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2113393146549674677.post-34118125235681410952011-06-03T15:51:00.001-07:002011-06-03T15:53:06.008-07:00

And weddings.Well, really, it's the alcohol. And the alcohol binges that happen after everyone goes home. Rawr. Now to scrape myself off the floor and go to yet ANOTHER celebration. Then another tomorrow. and the next day.... FMLI smell a fast coming up.... two days water followed by three all liquids starting Monday? Je pense oui.......I'm never drinking again.

hey.hanahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02776457730215361943noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2113393146549674677.post-68873402936094275672011-06-02T11:50:00.000-07:002011-06-02T12:05:35.842-07:00

Random moments I've been meaning to relate to ya'll:"yeah I ate only like a handful of almonds, I feel nuts" with goofy grin after one day of (almost) fasting. This was the Boy, and I just giggled inside.Then at salsa Boy's youngest sister who is currently designing swimsuits asked me if I had a favourite bra. "ahhhhhm...." I stammered, while picturing my favourite sparkly stripper bra in my

hey.hanahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02776457730215361943noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2113393146549674677.post-8466555551758961772011-06-02T08:44:00.000-07:002011-06-02T09:26:46.096-07:00

edit: will have a challenge post later today :editI HATE HAVING OBLIGATIONS! As my new roomie says, "should" is an ugly word. I "should" go to my boyfriend's sister's birthday dinner tonight. I "should" go to my other friend's bachelorette-type bar excursion ((the other bachelorette party was all ages, this is 21+. I'm not 21, but I have an ID that says I am ha ha ha)). Both events are with cool

hey.hanahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02776457730215361943noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2113393146549674677.post-83857614196758976952011-06-01T17:19:00.000-07:002011-06-01T17:57:47.939-07:00

Maybe not SO brilliant, but I love any game where I can win thousands of points:DSo basically, I give myself 10 points per minute of working out. I did a thirty minute video, I get 300 points today. Unless it's strength training, then each rep gets a point. I'm counting jumping jacks in strength training, even though it's technically cardio. I'm strengthening my heart!Food points come from

hey.hanahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02776457730215361943noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2113393146549674677.post-32749941267394271182011-06-01T08:37:00.000-07:002011-06-01T09:59:09.357-07:00

Challenge questions: http://skinny-is-my-goal.tumblr.com/30dayweightlosschllngeWho I got the challenge from: SophieWho she got this challenge from: Cinnamon Brownhttp://sincerelycinnamonbrown.blogspot.com/2011/05/fun-with-ariana.htmlWho SHE is doing this challenge with: Arianahttp://poundstoperfection.blogspot.com/((the linky thing isn't working no more... :/))yay me and my links!OK so first my

hey.hanahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02776457730215361943noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2113393146549674677.post-19766400826079303952011-05-31T07:11:00.000-07:002011-05-31T09:40:12.729-07:00

Partly because it is covered in hairdye and thus toxic to me, but Mostly because I don't need it anymore! I know how bad that shit is for me. I feel like I've gathered enough tools and proven to myself that I have to ability to control myself. Now simply to do it.All restriction from here on out. I was thinking of having an all-sweets day after ten days of decent restricting. It would have to

hey.hanahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02776457730215361943noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2113393146549674677.post-64427358056123803012011-05-27T07:50:00.001-07:002011-05-27T07:57:30.283-07:00

I wanted to start an e mail conversation and was so down to have a little chat but then my crying woke up my boyfriend and we had ANOTHER serious fucking talk about my depression and how I feel like he doesn't take it seriously ((he makes little comments like, "Oh, THAT'S why you were feeling that way, I get it now" when really, I FEEL THIS WAY BECAUSE I AM BLACK INSIDE YOU ARSEHOLE IT'S NOT SO

hey.hanahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02776457730215361943noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2113393146549674677.post-26851821291987582982011-05-26T15:41:00.001-07:002011-05-26T16:32:59.887-07:00

Total intake today:Weight control shake - 140Coffee - 10Another small coffee - 5And LOTS of water.Total: 155YAY! FINALLY! A break from my slovenly piggishness! I also got a test back today... 92.5% - and I was high as FUCK when I took it, so huh-yes! on that one...:DAND I stayed after class ((we were let out an hour early though, so technically I stayed until I was supposed to...)) and knocked

hey.hanahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02776457730215361943noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2113393146549674677.post-42911721409917028782011-05-26T06:54:00.000-07:002011-05-26T08:53:54.683-07:00

The boy is taking me. For twelve hours. For his sister's birthday. Arriving back home with mere hours to make it to my friends wedding. Hangover-esque? yes:]So I have to lose ten pounds in nine days. Normally I would say forget it except that I know a lot of this weight is the massive amount of food in my system PLUS being on my period doesn't help. Boy told me that his sister and her boss/friend

hey.hanahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02776457730215361943noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2113393146549674677.post-29277769073170848182011-05-25T11:15:00.000-07:002011-05-25T11:19:18.196-07:00

Will be my anti drug. I've been trying to avoid coffee for my health or whatever, but at this point I'm willing to do anything. I can't do this my roommate is walking around. I thought I could post and not look at blogs, but I just can't post when she might see. Although who could see from so far away? I have no clue. AghhhhOk will post later or on phone or soemthing.....Byeeeee!

hey.hanahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02776457730215361943noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2113393146549674677.post-32955406559135374592011-05-24T17:19:00.000-07:002011-05-24T17:21:07.463-07:00

It always ends in a binge. Maybe I should get myself under control before I try this again????????????????? Where are my meticulous plans when I need them??? Time to go through the archives... I'm kinda excited to go through older posts though. Bright sides to everything, yeah?FML.

hey.hanahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02776457730215361943noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2113393146549674677.post-81207097578730104482011-05-23T07:42:00.000-07:002011-05-23T10:31:39.526-07:00

Are all I need to survive in this world. And both aforementioned items my ahhMAZING boyfriend has purchased for my personal use and skinny-minny pleasure. It's almost scary how much this boy must GET me, as these are the two nicest, most thoughtful ((not to mention useful!)) gifts I've ever been given - no hints required.He got me the hand juicer because he wants to make this cleanse easier for

hey.hanahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02776457730215361943noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2113393146549674677.post-8532111585265939772011-05-20T15:48:00.000-07:002011-05-20T16:20:53.681-07:00

and I told the Boy again about my food problems... ((he has a way of getting to me when we talk, I can't fake anything or lie about anything to him)) his reply? "Everyone worries about their body, that's completely normal."Because we all know that's what we want to hear when we admit that we think we're the elephants in the room. That it's completely normal and average and nothing-to-worry-about.

hey.hanahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02776457730215361943noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2113393146549674677.post-25952841578589199492011-05-19T10:00:00.000-07:002011-05-19T10:05:28.687-07:00

That is EXACTLY what I did, no wonder I couldn't do it!! THank you, thank you! *kisses her feet* I'm not an absolute failure after all!Sorry I haven't been posting, it's been an emotional few days ((read: I failed. again.))But I'm working on a real-life fitness journal with goals, plans, rules, workouts, schedules for my life, the secret to happiness, etc. etc.More on this later, school now.

hey.hanahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02776457730215361943noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2113393146549674677.post-86330823287331765822011-05-17T11:31:00.000-07:002011-05-17T12:38:34.851-07:00

Another four hour summer school session just started... This time, though, I was clever enough to bring my portable computer/device (in my case an iPad) to dither away my time on. Today is my first *real* day on the master cleanse. I did all liquids yesterday as part of 'easing in', until 8 pm anyway when I binges on a pint of Ben and Jerry's - over 1000 calories! I hate how weak I am, how even

hey.hanahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02776457730215361943noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2113393146549674677.post-9983950363844216162011-05-16T13:43:00.000-07:002011-05-16T13:46:21.742-07:00

Which is four hour classes four days a week...And I have learned to never sit in the middle to back of a classroom (especially for such lengthy sessions). Because, that is where the fatties sit. I can barely hear the prof over the crinkling of chips bags, and if I have to smell another cheesy cheeto fart I swear I'll vomit.It probably doesn't help that I've been liquids only all day, or that I'm

hey.hanahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02776457730215361943noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2113393146549674677.post-12503202434685198092011-05-10T09:58:00.000-07:002011-05-10T10:01:30.176-07:00

I have decided that instead of being obsessed with caloric intake, to instead be obsessed with caloric output. And fitness and such.I cried in a bathroom stall at the mall the other day over my jeans size, and my mother dubiously commenting on the jeans I wanted (size 26, as a goal motivator. I also got size 27 to wear for now, as they are tight and a good motivator also)I am currently dying my

hey.hanahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02776457730215361943noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2113393146549674677.post-77155431097108780312011-05-09T08:38:00.000-07:002011-05-09T16:54:34.218-07:00

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jK_TXjN_73k&feature=relatedgotta stop the mia monster. My gums hurt and my burps have become mini-purges. Grosssssss.p.s. I hate mother's day. Easter, my dad's birthday, Mother's day... jesus why must we have large meals for EVERY holiday??

hey.hanahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02776457730215361943noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2113393146549674677.post-46539896288864168092011-05-04T16:37:00.001-07:002011-05-04T16:41:14.196-07:00

That I can have defined abs and still be FAT?

hey.hanahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02776457730215361943noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2113393146549674677.post-84458167451305210682011-05-04T04:20:00.001-07:002011-05-04T04:49:13.119-07:00

The first part speaks for itself, I think. I have a vitamin mix drink, a fiber/protein "weight loss powder" thing, and frozen berries to magic bullet up for yummyness.I feel bad for my stomach, it needs some rest.Now important things:: How to Avoid a Binge ::1. Count to 100 before touching any food. If you don't forget about it entirely or convince yourself solidly against it, try something else

hey.hanahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02776457730215361943noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2113393146549674677.post-1599304999874509672011-05-03T06:38:00.000-07:002011-05-03T06:53:58.387-07:00

Tips to avoid a binge, Tips for "being pretty" from the Strip Club ((I know so much make up/general attraction shit it's fucking stupid. I kinda want to type in the rules I had to follow at the club I was at and then general make up advice, b/c it's something every girl should know!))Why must my brilliant ideas happen when I'm late for school??

hey.hanahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02776457730215361943noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2113393146549674677.post-83263113206661507552011-05-02T07:24:00.000-07:002011-05-02T07:52:10.162-07:00

I've been up and down recently, and when I'm down I couldn't be less interested in sex (especially if I've been binging/purging because I'm down - who feels like taking a dick in their mouth when their stomach is bloated and their tongue tastes like acid? Exactly.) Anyway. So the boy asked me what was wrong Friday night, and after A Lot of stammering and the like, I finally told him about binging

hey.hanahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02776457730215361943noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2113393146549674677.post-38713427004764064342011-04-29T08:04:00.000-07:002011-04-29T08:26:43.578-07:00

I had to go back to the club (to strip), but I couldn't find any clothes in the bathroom (I would find something that fig me, put it down in front of me and when went to pick it up it would be buried underneath a bunch of other clothes and shoes. I had to find cute shoes that fit also). When it came time for me to dance, my head movie skipped over itto the next day...It had been an engagement

hey.hanahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02776457730215361943noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2113393146549674677.post-60587965474357444422011-04-28T13:56:00.001-07:002011-04-28T13:59:09.912-07:00

Random side question: where do all these photos of cute skinny girls opening/looking into/getting food out of refrigerators come from? How many girls with hip bones out to here are opening fridge doors? Are the photos supposed to make it LOOK like these girls eat to their own families? I feel like those photos could only come from accomplished dieters themselves or something... A sort of, ha!

hey.hanahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02776457730215361943noreply@blogger.com5tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2113393146549674677.post-74010405469041392982011-04-28T07:36:00.000-07:002011-04-28T07:53:35.309-07:00

So the toilet isn't my last post anymore.Hm hahm hmmm... Updates:The Boy is not only completely supportive of my raw food desires (when he was a penniless student he himself enjoyed such a diet), but he also wants to 'get fit' with me. He's over ten years older than me and has been complaining about not working out as much, his age catching up to him an all that jazz.... He even invited me to do

hey.hanahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02776457730215361943noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2113393146549674677.post-18137453008418065352011-04-26T14:43:00.001-07:002011-04-26T14:43:38.590-07:00

I promised I wouldn't do this again so soon, but when I went to throw that stupid french silk pie out it just..happened.  When will my new roomie get here so these 'accidents' will stop??

hey.hanahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02776457730215361943noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2113393146549674677.post-67852062125839645642011-04-26T09:20:00.000-07:002011-04-26T09:59:43.683-07:00

Whew! My binge last night is fighting its way out the other end... and it doesn't feel good (one the bright side, I don't feel like eating AT ALL).Ok. So. I mentioned in my last post how difficult diet-keeping is when every free moment is spent with The Boy. I really wanted to do the ABCD, and not only is it IMPOSSIBLE with that ever-watching eye but the one major change that has occurred during

hey.hanahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02776457730215361943noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2113393146549674677.post-69706091624524897402011-04-26T08:42:00.001-07:002011-04-26T09:02:57.221-07:00

I kept it in that syringe for a minute, but I knew telling the boy about it would ensure I wouldn't do it. He kept texting me to ask what I had done with it and that just pushed me over the "never again" edge (so yay for that. Although thank you all for your lovely comments and words of encouragement! It's hard to talk to people that understand what withdrawal is like, because usually such people

hey.hanahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02776457730215361943noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2113393146549674677.post-67982680325994271102011-04-25T07:48:00.001-07:002011-04-25T07:48:13.232-07:00

And now it is in an old animal med syringe (to give my cat meds by mouth after he got neutered) hidden in my room. If I can't touch it I should be throwing it away. OBVIOUSLY. Rawr.

hey.hanahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02776457730215361943noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2113393146549674677.post-2754211437640901452011-04-24T12:28:00.000-07:002011-04-24T12:29:21.899-07:00

http://28.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_lgjoanqprb1qh0b6no1_500.png

hey.hanahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02776457730215361943noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2113393146549674677.post-35662715541333239202011-04-23T09:16:00.000-07:002011-04-23T09:38:13.218-07:00

1) Done under a "Fasted State" either in the morning or 5 hours after eating2) Take 200mg caffeine 30 minutes before your workout3) 5-10 minutes of a low intensity warmup4) 10 minutes of High Intensity Interval Training5) 20-40 minutes of Steady State Cardio done at medium to low intensity. This is what is going to use those released fatty acids for fuel!6) Wait one hour and then eatSo I'm being

hey.hanahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02776457730215361943noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2113393146549674677.post-91465726106068674892011-04-22T18:14:00.001-07:002011-04-22T18:14:53.224-07:00

For boy. I'm so boooooored... Not to mention listless and unmotivated. It's hard to concentrate when you're hungry... Other complaints: the wifi isn't working on my ipad (thank goodness for my phone) Even when I had internet (at mah boy's place) I couldn't find any resources to help me make said boy think I'm eating when we go out, as that is practically all we do, so... I'm nervous for the

hey.hanahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02776457730215361943noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2113393146549674677.post-65250200350664688392011-04-22T11:58:00.000-07:002011-04-22T13:32:13.628-07:00

So I can keep these diet pills down... I can't be sure if it's the diet pills or the legitimate vitamins/supplements I take with them. Either way, I would rather not become dependent on pills, or need them to remain slender, so from now on I'll take one in the morning and allow two or three more throughout the day if I get really REALLY hungry. Is it bad if I like the pills because they give me

hey.hanahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02776457730215361943noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2113393146549674677.post-55218715359000119172011-04-21T11:55:00.000-07:002011-04-21T22:57:33.160-07:00

How to explain it to the bf, not so sure... Suggestions welcomed!I ditched class today (semi-accidentally, just kept reading blogs:P), and am now planning on going home to clean/purify/organize my abode (already planning on how I will move my furniture.. yes!) after swinging by walgreens to pick up a (gasp!) brand-spanking-new bathroom scale. I am both nervous and excited about this... I haven't

hey.hanahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02776457730215361943noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2113393146549674677.post-36092513974579117482011-04-21T09:05:00.000-07:002011-04-21T10:54:39.053-07:00

this morning (I'm not counting 4/20 as day 1 - I ate a pint of ice cream (560) with my friends after smoking ALL DAY - though I ate barely two bites of pancakes from the morning time munch-out - YAY for "gluten intolerance" - and the only other thing I ate was an orange. So not stellar, but not horrible)so yes. Ahm.. Motivated this morning as I'm counting it as day one... I pulled out all my old

hey.hanahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02776457730215361943noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2113393146549674677.post-80845596748682609392011-04-19T18:02:00.000-07:002011-04-20T18:20:14.526-07:00

Dunno if any of the same people will be reading this... Well I got out of needing this blog by replacing food addiction with partying/drugs (reach a very good weight doing that!) but have finally got out of THAT huge downward spiral only to... pick up my food addiction as soon as 3 1/2 months later.As I type I have a pint of ice cream melting at my elbow - I just bought it and it's unbearably

hey.hanahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02776457730215361943noreply@blogger.com5tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2113393146549674677.post-89785601277720188032010-04-13T13:22:00.001-07:002010-04-13T13:43:16.157-07:00

So, today was amazing in the fact that it reminded me that although I've been out of whack as far as feeling myself, my life is still endlessly entertaining ((thanks Raynay for reminding me who I am :P)).I bought a car yesterday with zero experience and without even really looking at if. BUT, if I hadn't have gotten a clunker that would break down four times in one morning drive to the DMV, I

hey.hanahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02776457730215361943noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2113393146549674677.post-542328930723647912010-03-30T15:40:00.000-07:002010-03-30T15:56:07.339-07:00

I'm not back forever, but I do feel that an update is due.I've broken up with the junkie, and six weeks of intense dramatics followed. I don't have the time to go into it all, but let's just say I was stupidly giving him a chance at friendship b/c he was 10 days clean and had "changed", but then he thought he still owned me and ended up saying things to me like I've never let anyone say before.

hey.hanahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02776457730215361943noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2113393146549674677.post-48115931759693358522009-12-13T21:39:00.000-08:002011-04-20T18:00:34.214-07:00

EDIT::video removed::EDIT - sorry!My life sucks at the moment.I thought I could hold out with a miserable, depressed person for whom it is apparently impossible for things to go right constantly around me. But I can't/don't know what to do.

hey.hanahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02776457730215361943noreply@blogger.com5tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2113393146549674677.post-1707848749341097152009-12-01T09:12:00.000-08:002011-04-20T18:01:50.607-07:00

In other news: I didn't go to DC. The boy in my life wasn't having it. And now he wants me to stop dancing, but I don't think he realizes that I NEED THE FLIPPING MONEY.But whatever.I have internet now!EDIT::videos removed::EDIT

hey.hanahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02776457730215361943noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2113393146549674677.post-36017689996561232202009-11-10T13:07:00.000-08:002009-11-10T13:14:06.251-08:00

New followers and old readers alike, thank you for the views :] Music is my life, and I'm seriously considering pursuing my dream and doing something with it - soon. Feedback is GREATLY appreciated!I'm trying to get some more videos of my different songs ((I have songs out the ASS)) online, but the internet situation at my place is non existent, so I'll have to take my laptop somewhere with

hey.hanahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02776457730215361943noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2113393146549674677.post-8044344034948917052009-10-28T14:46:00.001-07:002011-04-20T18:15:15.309-07:00

In a house with three roommatesWith the kitchen right outside my doorThe smack addict lying beside meDon't know who I am anymoreexcept that these red nails are plastic....Here's the latest:EDIT::video removed::EDITgood luck/will to all :]EDIT: First, thank you anonymous:] I'm pretty lucky in my life most of the time.Second: yes, that is me. Thank you :]] I love this song, but then again all the

hey.hanahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02776457730215361943noreply@blogger.com6tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2113393146549674677.post-44682605369561561262009-10-21T12:00:00.000-07:002009-10-21T12:03:36.784-07:00

plea for help.What can I tell her???She won't believe that I have friends that like me enough to lend me that kind of money without me doing something for it...................Though I wonder how long I can keep it a secret?:Pweight is awful with all the stress I've been under plus a boy who buys chocolate milk all the time ((not to mention donuts and the like...)) but I have one more test today

hey.hanahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02776457730215361943noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2113393146549674677.post-40629576200109889962009-10-20T22:36:00.001-07:002009-10-20T22:41:34.257-07:00

away from the crazy landlord and into an equally crazy house ((but for different reasons)) a block across the street from my school, and over $100 cheaper.The problem is my parents don't know and I don't know how to explain how I managed to pay for the whole thing...And I have a paper to write and a test tomorrow and French//Spanish hw to do........And I'm dating a heroin addict.Who likes to buy

hey.hanahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02776457730215361943noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2113393146549674677.post-8363918362624832482009-10-01T11:39:00.000-07:002009-10-01T11:44:17.766-07:00

I was feeling fat this morning, so I weighed myself for the first time in forever and I was 119, my first GW.All I've been eating lately is a bunch of crap... pot brownies (TONS of these. Pleurisy is v. painful and I shouldn't be smoking anything), peanuts/crackers from the vending machine at school, Naked Green Machine juice (SO yum), vegan pizza, and of course coffee.So glad that when I'm only

hey.hanahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02776457730215361943noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2113393146549674677.post-75038271003042446762009-09-23T23:20:00.000-07:002009-09-23T23:37:53.630-07:00

and pleurisy. These things are now my life.If anyone is interested in pre-colonial America and has suggestions for what the FUCK I could say in a five page first person account of living here in 1680 (including what "I" think of England and the Indians) many kudos, brownie points, and possibly a cheque in the mail would be yours in return.Also, I just started crying uncontrollably because my

hey.hanahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02776457730215361943noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2113393146549674677.post-80886002384254960582009-09-19T10:39:00.001-07:002009-09-19T10:44:54.354-07:00

from Chicago. It's only saturday and it could be monday morning for all I know.....Going out with that guy was fun, and he's just old enough where getting hard is getting HARD for him, especially after a few drinks ... :P So most of the night was just plain fun. This guy is a big little kid (i.e. super fun to play around with) until he gets drunk - then he's a big baby (yay for taking care of

hey.hanahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02776457730215361943noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2113393146549674677.post-67096468514841035642009-09-12T09:52:00.000-07:002009-09-12T10:18:06.997-07:00

I have been slacking at school. On Wednesday I was sent home for coughing so much because I could have H1N1 (swine flu). I didn't tell them that I had just partied/smoked too much and slept not enough and took the day off. Now I have to go to urgent care or some shiv to get documentation or whatever so as to be excused, when the school is the one who told me not to be there. Bitches.I made hardly

hey.hanahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02776457730215361943noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2113393146549674677.post-64736077745651611122009-09-02T12:25:00.000-07:002009-09-02T12:28:40.110-07:00

before I learn my lesson ?Been slacking in school, but didn't stop me from getting a 90 on my French test ((without really trying))should do some tarea de espanolshould read for my other classes, also, but I prefer to test my bullshit abilityp.s. I am now a stripper (!!!) at this super classy place. The classiest, actually, AND the oldest. Did I mention dancing around for eight hours is great

hey.hanahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02776457730215361943noreply@blogger.com6tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2113393146549674677.post-70591719143088534392009-08-23T12:52:00.000-07:002009-08-23T12:53:53.727-07:00

I feel like this is my life:And now to read up in Sociology and Psychology

hey.hanahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02776457730215361943noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2113393146549674677.post-89257585025593941082009-08-19T12:04:00.000-07:002009-08-19T12:27:51.403-07:00

Binged the rest of my bread last night... 6 slices (600) plus massive amounts of pb & j (?) No urge to purge, so that much is good.This morning I had the rest of my strawberries (20) which were sooooooo delicious and sweet. That caused a BM, which was nice ((and unexpected, as always)). After my cigarette, another noteworthy BM, and then ANOTHER after my coffee. It was fucking nuts, but I guess

hey.hanahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02776457730215361943noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2113393146549674677.post-21631468978764762392009-08-17T05:55:00.000-07:002009-08-17T06:12:46.064-07:00

And I pull you to the edge......So I bought ten dollars of groceries yesterday (more and more recently if I don't eat SOMETHING I feel increasingly ill until it's all I can do to roll up in a ball and close my eyes against the nausea, so I try to have a little something to nibble on when that happens) which is all the money I have in the world. My mother gave me 100 dollars at the end of the

hey.hanahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02776457730215361943noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2113393146549674677.post-55710994976212471152009-08-16T14:27:00.000-07:002009-08-17T05:39:00.116-07:00

122.6 post bm, 121.6 pre. Yes.I lost my phone last night after leaving my charger somewhere random, and a creepy taxi driver that kept talking about people running from the bill and how he catches them every time gave me a new one that might work might not...I slept through my friend's band's party bus pre-concert, which would have been fucking AWESOME and changed the outcome of my night

hey.hanahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02776457730215361943noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2113393146549674677.post-79341382343114572332009-08-11T21:08:00.000-07:002009-08-11T21:09:44.084-07:00

So many things.... I might have some free time soon, maybe. I wanna get the new photos up for sure, b/c you should be as updated as possible.Now to battle with b-day cake.

hey.hanahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02776457730215361943noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2113393146549674677.post-21797189632426634522009-07-30T12:40:00.000-07:002009-07-30T13:36:58.786-07:00

I wish I could say that ((see: comment on previous post about how I'm going through a rough patch)), but once again my life amazes even me.Updates:Just finished my last final, and now must only format and print twenty copies of a "chapbook" ((small collection of work in a ghetto little booklet that is stapled together)) and I'm done with summer semester. Two weeks of freedom before fall! Sweet!

hey.hanahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02776457730215361943noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2113393146549674677.post-70387894887203895162009-07-16T06:33:00.000-07:002009-07-16T07:00:26.628-07:00

*I bought a $.99 box of ice cream from king sooper's and brought it to my spanish class where everyone proceeded to give me shit for two and a half hours, even after I tried shaking it off, even after I offered to run and get everyone spoons, even after I inevitably threw the (80% full) thing away and wiped the stickiness from my fingers. I am now known as "la chica helada loca." I guess they

hey.hanahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02776457730215361943noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2113393146549674677.post-90932892313100664762009-06-29T19:48:00.000-07:002009-06-29T19:53:22.765-07:00

The prompt for class was completely different, but my prof once said if you get inspired don't force yourself to stop just to complete the assignment. So I'm hoping I can just use this... Let me know if you like it or if it's good at all. I'm not finished, but I'm working on it.Document"We drift deeper into the sound, feeling strong. So bring it on." - Gabriel and Dresden feat. Molly "Distract me

hey.hanahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02776457730215361943noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2113393146549674677.post-29800740222529242252009-06-29T10:33:00.000-07:002009-06-29T13:46:16.140-07:00

Day 1 (Monday) - morning: binge, laxies, caffeineafternoon: carrots/water (100)night: silk (60)Day 2 - morn: 1/2 can black bean (190)noon: peach (70), carrots (50)night: popsicle (10)Day 3 - morn: 1/2 bottle of yogurt (30)noon: cucumber (15)night: popsicle (10)Day 4 - morn: 1/2 bottle of yogurt (30)noon: banana (110)night: noodles w/ sauce (300)Day 5 - 6:30 AM RUN8:30 - milk (45), shower9:15 -

hey.hanahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02776457730215361943noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2113393146549674677.post-80759409962277430282009-06-26T19:52:00.001-07:002009-06-26T19:52:58.774-07:00

But I'm working on it.Sorry girls!

hey.hanahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02776457730215361943noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2113393146549674677.post-65970741798834891172009-06-25T14:19:00.001-07:002009-06-25T14:19:59.213-07:00

.. but I'm still reading at least!I'll write again soon, promise:]

hey.hanahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02776457730215361943noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2113393146549674677.post-71359357921417694762009-06-04T22:27:00.000-07:002009-06-05T11:15:48.158-07:00

Played DDRMax2 for at least 25 minutes last night = +15Binged ((was smoking the reefer with the boys, and then went to king sooper's with one of them. HUGE cupcake. A pound of strawberries. So good, so bad.)) = -15Today:Exercise = +15Water = +4Under intake = +10sleeping instead of walking to the grocery store for cookie dough = priceless :]total: 29Will run upon waking tomorrow ((I didn't get to

hey.hanahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02776457730215361943noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2113393146549674677.post-8024184155106567612009-06-03T20:02:00.000-07:002009-06-03T20:22:25.905-07:00

so so so so tired. Dinner with the dad today. Fun fun fun. Ha. ha ha.2 coffees - 101/5 bag of light popcorn - 101 kiwi - 50fiber/gummy vitamins - 50Buddha's feast at p.f. chang's - 3001 prune - 10SF jello cup - 10veggie sandwich thing ((but not the bread)) - 80anything I may have forgotten - 80total: 600If you remember I didn't count my deficit yesterday to make up for the situation on Monday...

hey.hanahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02776457730215361943noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2113393146549674677.post-65886746817467670462009-06-03T00:36:00.001-07:002009-06-03T00:48:56.138-07:00

My stomach is finally empty. My ribs ripple beneath my skin. You can feel the joints of my shoulders. I don't even WANT to eat, because I want to keep this glorious feeling going long as possible.Todays intake:4 1/2 strawberries - 301 peach ring - 23Food total: 53 1 coffee w/ splenda - 51 med americano with splenda - 20Juice/fiber - 502 beers - 290Drink total: 365Total sans beer/fiber: 78Total

hey.hanahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02776457730215361943noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2113393146549674677.post-51698667033414535002009-06-02T10:45:00.000-07:002009-06-02T12:12:30.665-07:00

I spent the night doing yayo with the MOB last night. He picked me up from my parent's house ((where my mother decided to pick a fight with me right as I was leaving after an ENTIRE WEEKEND of nearly no conflict. And then she called me today telling me to figure out if I'm dropping a class now when I told my parents MULTIPLE times that I have to GO TO THE FREAKING CLASS in order to SEE IF THE

hey.hanahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02776457730215361943noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2113393146549674677.post-57903025591978209342009-05-31T20:05:00.000-07:002009-05-31T21:16:59.922-07:00

The first day of the competition ((go team blue!)) is tomorrow. Yogurt and salad will be my main source of sustenance. Also, I go home tomorrow! I'm a little nervous... Part of me can't wait to get back and see all my friends, part of me wants to not tell anyone I'm back in town and become a recluse until I've figured out what I want in life so I can go for it ((my sister told me she just wants

hey.hanahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02776457730215361943noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2113393146549674677.post-69343352464417393812009-05-30T08:29:00.000-07:002009-05-30T08:41:31.366-07:00

Birthdays. Why can't we have a birthday triathlon instead of cake?Ran for 45 min, weight room for 30.Prolly burned about 350-400 cals. "Breakfast" ((aka greasy eggs, cardboard-like pancakes, whatever the opposite of crisp is toast, "instant" [read: toxic] oatmeal and two cups of coffee)) was easily much much more than that. And I still have the birthday lunch/cocktails/dinner to go to. Joy to the

hey.hanahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02776457730215361943noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2113393146549674677.post-36633156212954731262009-05-28T21:21:00.000-07:002009-05-28T21:55:33.300-07:00

So I haven't counted any calories today, but I HAVE managed to stick to my plan for the most part.The six hour drive down here wasn't too too terrible, but it still wasn't fun. The worst part is my sister drove me down here, but on the way back she's going straight to a small mountain town from Santa Fe, where we are now. So I have to ride the seven-eight hour ((if you go five under the limit,

hey.hanahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02776457730215361943noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2113393146549674677.post-19826917206971842842009-05-27T15:01:00.000-07:002009-05-28T09:35:50.530-07:00

On my "real life" blog !"You are seriously so thin!!!Im totally jealous...i love your little sticks for arms and legs lol.Xx."RhiannaWow I can't believe someone actually looks at my other blog! I've been neglecting it because it's so much more satisfying when you know people look at the work you did... Ha ha well thanks chica I can't wait until my waist is as stick-ish as my limbs! :]Other news:

hey.hanahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02776457730215361943noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2113393146549674677.post-54512304988217641502009-05-26T19:44:00.000-07:002009-05-26T20:01:08.764-07:00

I ran for over an hour today ((in addition to my regular calisthenics)) and I'm hoping that somehow makes up for the complete BINGE that has been the last two days.I've purged as many times, but I'd rather not talk about it.The MOB is amazing, but I can't enjoy sex while I feel this disgusting. I want to explain that it's really not his fault but how do you bring up something like that? "Oh yeah,

hey.hanahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02776457730215361943noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2113393146549674677.post-83440801638495048852009-05-23T16:28:00.000-07:002009-05-23T21:43:46.355-07:00

Hung out at the MOB's for a bit.This next bit may be TMI for some... ha ha. I was on top of MOB in his bed ((naked)) and he started sucking on my nips. Always the queerest sensation... Like it tickles but with sporadic waves of pleasure. Anyway I had moved up to allow him easier access to my ta tas and he pushed me away with an "Ow!" I asked him if he was OK."Yeah, just hip bone into ribs.""MY

hey.hanahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02776457730215361943noreply@blogger.com6tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2113393146549674677.post-86843579600665464242009-05-21T13:56:00.000-07:002009-05-23T21:18:11.970-07:00

120 exactly this morning on the scale in MOB's bathroom.I tried to explain what I write about on this blog to the MOB last night without outright admitting to it beginning as a vain, foolish, food-issue-related whatever ((although I don't feel like it's been limited to just that for a while now)).He says he wants to read it (("even though it'll probably be embarrassing," he says. Thanks for

hey.hanahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02776457730215361943noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2113393146549674677.post-42685359361157346132009-05-18T21:01:00.000-07:002009-05-19T11:49:57.783-07:00

This is a "fictional" story I wrote. ((hint: Robby = MOB, Jimmy = the author, Hannah = moi:])) "I'm sorry," she had imagined herself saying when the inevitable moment occurred. It was truly impossible to begin to guess how he would react. Hannah imagined several possibilities, but all paled in comparison to his actual reaction. At first he appeared taken aback, and maybe a little shocked. He sat

hey.hanahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02776457730215361943noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2113393146549674677.post-12546776268581507272009-05-16T21:36:00.000-07:002009-05-18T13:53:25.066-07:00

Rocks my world//fav song to play/sing so I recorded a vid. Jeepers I love this song. Other news: I've for sure chosen the MOB. The author apparently has herpes (!)plutty photo MOB took of me last night:now onto the boys' as I haven't seen them in TOO long

hey.hanahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02776457730215361943noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2113393146549674677.post-80597876395888748512009-05-14T23:55:00.000-07:002009-05-14T23:58:59.771-07:00

a friend of mine who attends film school asked me to audition for a lead role in a student film he's working on. He said I seemed perfect for the part. The part is a skater-punk-chick. I used to be skater-punk ((or at least I thought I was, ha ha))GZ found a bunch of clothes in an alley and in addition to a faux-snakeskin skirt I also got this funny ddt t-shirt that would fit me perfectly if my

hey.hanahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02776457730215361943noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2113393146549674677.post-84201933540161942452009-05-14T12:33:00.001-07:002009-05-23T21:12:41.911-07:00

I'm just going to start where my last real post left off and go through everything... This may be segmented as I have a Spanish final in four hours and I just took some addy to help me study. I just feel SO bad about neglecting my blog and my writing in general. It's definitely a part of me I'd like to keep around.Oh fuck my memory this isn't going to work. I'll just give you the low down of my

hey.hanahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02776457730215361943noreply@blogger.com6tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2113393146549674677.post-36468499635657771382009-05-13T11:25:00.001-07:002009-05-13T11:26:20.446-07:00

running late to luncheons and all.I might begin my book today; I feel inspired.thanks for comments and more laterp.p.s. yes, BMs rock ((they're usually rare for me too, but stick an 8 ball in me and there you go))

hey.hanahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02776457730215361943noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2113393146549674677.post-10418968975395214772009-05-12T12:19:00.000-07:002009-05-12T12:36:43.693-07:00

Laura from Getting There Again has not simply gone missing, but has been forced to delete her blog for unknown ((but pretty guessable)) reasons. Basically look out for her new blog which will hopefully happen sometime soon...Other news: 123 according to GZ's scale, but I don't like her scale ((it changes on me constantly and dunno if ANY scale is accurate))Gross news: I had SO many BMs last night

hey.hanahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02776457730215361943noreply@blogger.com5tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2113393146549674677.post-52405184423992675382009-05-11T23:03:00.000-07:002009-05-11T23:26:38.424-07:00

Slash what the fuck. I keep waiting for this roller coaster called my life to stop so I can get off, shake off the sillies, and get back to work. But the fun just doesn't stop. It's getting ridiculous.Something odd did happen today though. Remember the French Boy (FB)? He called me up today when I was on my way back to GZ's from tanning on one of my boy's roof. He insisted we meet up, so I agree

hey.hanahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02776457730215361943noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2113393146549674677.post-52751816984570145672009-05-07T20:48:00.000-07:002009-05-07T20:49:25.877-07:00

clothes/shoes on: 124.6c/s off: 124/6WTFgotta go meet some peeps at the grateful dead show, maybe get some dose.I have SO much to tell you all, but tomorrw, I swear!pace

hey.hanahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02776457730215361943noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2113393146549674677.post-9390466732009920402009-05-07T00:51:00.000-07:002009-05-07T01:59:06.046-07:00

Co-c0-caine, co-co-co-caine-caine, co-c0-caine cainecainecaincainecaineHa ha. Guess what I've been up to:]I'm mildly ashamed of myself, but glad I was able to stop when I did. ((in reference to list below:))intake in last two days:2 oranges (100)1 turkey sammy whatever thing ((I was SO sore and thought maybe I should eat some protein or whatever. Also, no sauces or cheese, add mushroom, add black

hey.hanahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02776457730215361943noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2113393146549674677.post-18768086421359184842009-05-04T17:15:00.000-07:002009-05-04T17:35:37.063-07:00

So I forgot about my dad's birthday dinner... I've had nothing since the orange and spike though so if I eat lite I'll be OK. Oh and just random fyi I was 122.4 at my house and 122.0 at GZ's... I like GZ's scale :PI was writing a birthday card to my dad, and I felt like I had so much more I wanted him to know. So I wrote him a letter. Dunno if I'll give it to him yet. I'll see how I feel.Dear Dad

hey.hanahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02776457730215361943noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2113393146549674677.post-30700519511687719212009-05-04T09:42:00.000-07:002009-05-04T09:53:52.101-07:00

Intake:1 orange (50)1 spike energy drink (0)I'm feeling pretty good! The paper wasn't due today, but I got to make up the conference I slept through with my prof and he said it was a super strong paper and I'll most likely get an A and blah blah blah blah. I didn't tell him that paper was a product of two different kinds of pills, beer, and four hours.Then in the class I'm sitting here right now,

hey.hanahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02776457730215361943noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2113393146549674677.post-23105394132024591582009-05-03T21:15:00.000-07:002009-05-04T02:12:36.291-07:00

asked DB ((Drummer Boy, the one who gave me loads of yay when I went to the club for the first time slash took me out a couple other times)) moments after we entered his home."Here," he handed me half a horse pill. "This is a muscle relaxer. And this," he dropped a smaller red pill with cut edges into my palm, "is a quarter of an adderall.""Look like I chose the right study buddy..." I swallowed

hey.hanahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02776457730215361943noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2113393146549674677.post-27310847147521678872009-05-02T11:55:00.001-07:002009-05-02T12:01:16.686-07:00

came by yesterday to give me some shorts she got from wherever the hell my parents went on vacation as well as some food ((all of which I'm contributing to the pinata at my friend's cinco de julio party tonight)), $100 worth of shredded bills, and the like.She exclaimed in shock, "They fit!" when I came out of my bathroom in the M plaid shorts she got me. Yes, they fit. But just barely, and only

hey.hanahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02776457730215361943noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2113393146549674677.post-12103859188278314642009-04-28T04:23:00.000-07:002009-04-28T04:56:35.539-07:00

Fuck. My luck. Fuck fuck, my luck. I said fuck! My luck! Fuck, fuck! My luck!!ha ha sorry. My body just woke up at 5:15 am for some inexplicable reason and I decided to blog a bit before ptfo again.So I really don't understand what males find so attractive in me. For real, I have like 10293820948 blemishes on my face at the moment, a huge red spot suckling on my pupil, and I probably smell like

hey.hanahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02776457730215361943noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2113393146549674677.post-56265214326485507782009-04-27T09:49:00.000-07:002009-04-27T13:52:12.463-07:00

I have a paper on rituals due in three hours and I haven't started it.What are some rituals ya'll do with dieting and whatnot? I'm thinking about putting something about how often I weigh myself and it allays my anxiety, counting calories ensures my good performance, and how every meal I miss suppresses foreboding forces.Or I could write about birthdays.EDIT: Thanks Lulu! And yes, they do.Now I

hey.hanahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02776457730215361943noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2113393146549674677.post-44079575009147359242009-04-27T05:21:00.000-07:002009-04-27T05:48:29.671-07:00

and bought a camera. Can't live without one, really though!Can't decide which of these three I like best, the first two are so trippy but.. yeah ha ha:I found this sweater on the ground a month or so ago and washed it yesterday. It was a turtle neck but I cut it off ((also - I washed it in hot water and dried it with the intent of shrinking it which it kinda did.)) Cute, right ?:POther news: It

hey.hanahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02776457730215361943noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2113393146549674677.post-40060062618032161932009-04-26T11:59:00.001-07:002009-04-26T12:15:02.425-07:00

Last night I pregamed with two different groups of people, got picked up and driven to my fav club where I got in for free ((didn't even need i.d.)), where I got free molly and danced the night away. And didn't throw up once ((unlike when I went to the church and threw up like five times altogether))! So it was a good night.We went to the dealers place after the club closed and rolled with lights

hey.hanahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02776457730215361943noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2113393146549674677.post-87448247661189384372009-04-24T19:56:00.000-07:002009-04-24T20:03:47.846-07:00

I just got home, lifted up my laptop lid, and was greeted with a google search result page up for "free std screening".But I never searched for "free std screening". WHAT. The FUCK.I checked my history but since I went back to see what pages were back ((just google)) and then forward again ((stupid stupid)) it showed the time as the current time. And I could possibly have more clues if I wasn't a

hey.hanahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02776457730215361943noreply@blogger.com4